According to Doyle

"Grief is like a disease, a worm that eats on you from the inside out. It's something you can feel, but can't quite see. You're just not the same as you were before that worm started in on you."

~Doyle Brunson

From "The Godfather of Poker"

I am nearly finished with this book, and of all the things in the book that struck me....this one just seemed to stick. Doyle is an intelligent, insightful man. I am very happy I picked up this book and was able to see some of his non-poker wisdom in print.

There Will be Moustaches

File this one under "I have no idea where this came from."

Over the last few nights, my dreams have had one strange thing in common....middle aged dudes with mustaches. And I think the funniest thing of all is that none of them were my father.

Of the dreams, only one really sticks out in my mind and that is the one that had someone in it who looked an awful lot like Daniel Day-Lewis from There Will be Blood. Long story short, the guy too a special interest in me and my life and was watching me. Kinda stalker-ish, but hey....I'm used to a little bit of stalking here and there anyway, right?

Well, at one point it got really creepy because he wanted to watch everything I did. EVERYTHING. Just my morning routine alone would be horrible to share with anyone....much less other various things throughout the day. He ended up offering me money, but I just couldn't handle it.

One of the few positives about not sleeping well lately is that I tend to remember more dreams now than when I do sleep well.

How to Destroy Angels

04 from How To Destroy Angels on Vimeo.

Time to Go....

Obvious statement number 47; I am someone who avoids funeral homes.

Yesterday was my first visit to one in almost 2 years, when my cousin Danny died. I didn't want to be at that one either, but Danny was only a month older than me and we were really close friends as kids, even playing football together for a year on a city rec team. Seeing him in his casket just reaffirmed one of the things I dislike so much about funerals. My last memory of him wasn't anything spectacular, it was just Danny being himself at a family party. We didn't talk much, and hadn't talked much at all in years. Our lives went in different directions, and that was basically it.

When I think about Danny, it's generally memories of us doing things as kids. Throwing each other, and anyone else unfortunate enough to be near us, around inside a moonwalk at a railroad picnic, ragging on him whenever we'd meet girls and he would clam up and not say a word, or avoiding contact drills with each other during football practice. We were always about the same size, but at that time I was much stronger than Danny, I would often play OL/DL and he was strictly a WR/DB, so lining up against each other in practice would have just led to humiliation for him when I ran him over, or even MORE humiliation for me if he ran me over. The coaches understood that, and since we were both really good players they let it slide to help maintain our egos.

Almost all of my memories of him are things like that. A smiling, happy-go-lucky kid. Not the guy I saw laying in that box. That's the one thing I would have liked to have changed about being at his funeral. I was going to go to that one no matter what, but wished it would have been handled a little different.

Danny's was one of only three funerals in the last 10 years that I really felt a need to go to. Shunta' and my uncle Dennis were the other two. Shunta' had a closed casket, and my uncle was cremated so I didn't deal with that at either of their funerals. All three were very close to me in one way or another, and all three left this existence suddenly and too damn early. That had a lot to do with my desire to be there, and wasn't just family obligation like last night.

There are plenty of reasons to avoid funeral homes, but to me I think the biggest thing is seeing people I really care about in a state of grief when someone close to them dies. I handle those situations MUCH better one on one, but there is always the mass effect to deal with in the funeral home. I often counter that by finding one or two people to talk to someplace other than the main viewing area. Last night it was the lounges. One downstairs where I could find a bottle of water, the other at the top of those stairs, right by this oh-so-lovely wall clock. Of the 4 hours we were there, I spent about 90 minutes combined in these two areas, and most of that was in the upper lounge talking one-on-one with a cousin.

He is actually a second cousin, and closer to my dad's age than my own, but we had quite a good talk for a lot longer than either of us expected, and he decided to impart upon me some wisdom from his life experience. I guess I'd be expected to divulge that now, but I am gonna keep that all to myself.

Going to the funeral home yesterday did solidify my wishes for after I die though. I have pretty much always wanted to be cremated, but I am obviously very anti-funeral home. I'd much prefer a Marktoberfest style party over some quiet, stuffy service. Hell, it'd be the one time I'd lift any of my three party rules....but only the one about the kids. If any douchebags or guys with popped collars show up to that, I will haunt them for all eternity. I'll have the time.

More Wings

So the Wings lost last night, but played pretty well for most of the game. Take away that minute and a half where SJ scored three goals, and it's a dominating performance for the winged wheels....but it's not like you can do that in sports. Sometimes dominating for 59 or 60 minutes will not get you the win, and as a veteran team the Wings should know that.

Anyway, I meant to put this pic up yesterday but got sidetracked (I know that's a shock, right?) somehow and forgot to post it. Well here it is. It's not from a recent game, but it's a great moment after a goal....especially if you look to the left of Lidstrom and check out the classy Chicago fan saluting our goal scorer.
(Click on picture to enlarge)

NHL Playoffs 2010, Round 2, Part 2

And here's a little something I just read on the Detroit Free Press site that makes the schedule for this upcoming round just that much more inconvenient.

"Apparently the Red Wings knew the way to San Jose, they just didn’t know about the curfew at the airport.

It seems the Norman Mineta San Jose International Airport bans airplanes from landing or taking off between 11:30 p.m. and 6:30 a.m.

The Wings, who eliminated the Coyotes from the playoffs with a 6-1 victory Tuesday night, flew in from Phoenix after the game and landed at 12:19 a.m. Wednesday.

According to the San Jose Mercury News, the Red Wings are subject to a $2,500 fine.

Game 1 of the Wings-Sharks Western Conference semifinal series begins at 9 tonight."

I know a $2500 fine isn't going to bother the team in the least, but what happens when they want to fly home after game 2 and/or 5? Game 2 starts at 5pm in San Jose, so there shouldn't be any problem getting out of there before 11:30 unless the game goes into OT. Game 5 however would start at 7pm local time, and the team would have to rush out the door to get to the airport in time to leave before the curfew.

Now I assume the planes are required by the FAA to get clearance from the tower at each airport before take off. Would this ban completely stop them from taking off until 6:30am? Cause I gotta figure that sitting on a plane, no matter how nice the plane is, for up to 7 hours after playing an NHL playoff game might just take it's toll on some players.

I know I am dealing with "what ifs" here, but I could see this becoming a real issue if the bitter San Jose fans working at the airport don't handle these situations with tact.

NHL Playoffs 2010, Round 2

Last night as I laid down for bed, I still hadn't heard what the schedule was going to be like for the second round match-up between Detroit and San Jose. I thought that I came up with a pretty good schedule myself, and thought that there was a good chance that it would be very much like I had expected it to be. The one detail I forgot was that this was the NHL we are talking about....logic doesn't mean a thing to them when it comes to scheduling. So I am still trying to figure out how this makes sense.

Game 1: Thursday, April 29 at San Jose, 9:00 p.m.
Game 2: Sunday, May 2 at San Jose, 8:00 p.m.
Game 3: Tuesday, May 4 at Detroit, 7:30 p.m.
Game 4: Thursday, May 6 at Detroit, 7:30 p.m.
Game 5: Saturday, May 8 at San Jose, 10:00 p.m.
Game 6: Monday, May 10 at Detroit, 7:30 p.m.
Game 7: Wednesday, May 12 at San Jose, TBD

There are so many things I could question here, but the biggest thing to me is the quick turnaround after travel days for each venue change other than between games 6 & 7. I guess it could be worse....Chicago and Vancouver play every other day throughout their series, and the travel time between those two cities is almost as bad.

Whatever. The scheduling must be harder to figure out than I think, right? But no matter what, it can't be as hard as it's going to be for the SJ defenders to figure out how this....

turns into this....

in the blink of an eye.

McPhotos

I'm not going to turn this into a Redskins blog or anything, but seeing this photo made me kinda giddy. Since I've been a fan, the Redskins haven't had a quarterback that I like nearly as much as I like Donovan....and he was an Eagle until recently, so it's pretty amazing that I liked him as much as I did before the trade. There are the concerns about his age and durability to worry about, especially if Rex Grossman ends up being the second QB over Colt Brennan now that Campbell is gone, but I am comfortable with the risk for the reward. With Shanahan running things and three talented, albeit a little older, RBs to choose from, I think the running game will be what carries this team....something McNabb never had with the Eagles.

No matter what, I am already more excited for this coming season than I have been for any approaching season in years. I have mentioned more than once that I felt a change in myself pretty much right after my crash. Well, lately I have seen a lot more of my old self shining through and looking forward to the upcoming season is another good example....but that is an entirely different blog post.

Both of these photos are courtesy of Getty Images, and are just a part of the recent photo shoot they did with Donovan. Click on either of them to get a nice hi-res version.

Round 1 of the 2010 NFL Draft; My Thoughts and Observations

The NFL draft has been one of those "can't miss" events for me for more than a decade. Mark and I started a tradition of going to BW3 for the draft quite by accident. One year in the mid to late 90s we were up at CMU visiting some friends for the weekend and decided we wanted to watch the draft, but didn't want to hold their TV hostage all day (the house we were staying in was occupied by four girls) and we really didn't want to watch it on a tiny TV anyway. One of the girls, either Kelley or Angela I believe, suggested BW3 when we asked if there was a sports bar or something similar that might be open for the draft. We had never heard of the place before, even though we drove right by it every time we came to visit them....which was pretty damn often.

So we went there, had some food and some pop while we watched the draft and really enjoyed ourselves. I know it was only pop, even though Mark pretty much HAS to have beer when he watches anything sports related, because it was the 1997 draft or earlier and we wouldn't have been 21 yet. Because of some unfortunate events brought up myself by sheer stupidity, I missed most of the 1998 draft after trying my damndest to suck it up and make it through at least the first round. That didn't happen, and when I was told that the Lions drafted Terry Fair in the first round, I felt even sicker that when I had left BW3.

This year marked a HUGE change in the draft plans for us. Instead of meeting up at BW3 for an all day event on Saturday, the NFL decided it would be a good idea to have the first round in prime time this year....on a THURSDAY night. As if I don't have trouble finding time to sleep as it is. Thanks Commish.

The whole thing kinda soured me about our plans for the draft this year until, through a series of events at work, I found out I would be going in late on Friday morning. After that, I was cool with staying out late enough for the first round to be completed....especially when I found out Mike was willing to drive to the Dearborn BW3 for it.

Anyway, here's just some random thoughts I had about the draft.

Ndamukong Suh was not the first overall pick in the draft, Sam Bradford was, which pleased my inner Lion fan. Well, that part of me wasn't 100% pleased until Roger Goodell officially announced Suh as the second overall pick. The Bucs didn't do anything surprising at number 3 and took Gerald McCoy like everyone expected. Then it was time for my Skins to pick....and that's where the first surprise of the draft hit.

The pick itself did not surprise any of us, I had even told Mike who we'd pick just a few minutes before. It's not a flashy pick at all, but it's the perfect fit for the team needs as seen by Mike Shanahan. The surprise was how Goodell announced the pick saying, "Trent 'Silverback' Williams" when he read the card. Williams explained it all later on, saying that he jokingly asked the commissioner to use his nickname when he was announced as a pick. He didn't expect it, but he seemed very happy about it and gave Goodell a big hug.


Speaking of....did anyone else notice that Mr. Commissioner was kind of lovey dovey with a bunch of these guys last night? If I didn't know any better, I'd say Roger was about 4-5 fingers in by the time the draft started.

"How YOU doin?"

After the 4th pick, my level of interest dropped a bit since my two favorite teams had already picked for the night, but there were still a few things I'd like to go over....unfortunately I have run out of time for this post. It's amazing how much longer it takes to write this garbage of mine when there are a bunch of pics involved. Hopefully I'll get a chance to finish this up on Monday.

Happy Earth Day

Save the owls. :-)

You Spin My Head Right Round

I feel as if my head is spinning lately. It's spinning so fast that nothing has a chance of attaching itself to my brain right now. Add on to that the fact that insomnia decided to pay me a visit again last night, and I am gonna be a God-damned train wreck come later tonight....when I have two major tests to take in one class. Fun.

My thoughts and words seem to be failing me of late. For someone that fancies himself extremely adept at both, it's rather disconcerting. I don't seem to know what to say or even think most of the time right now. Even writing this is a struggle for me. My thoughts used to funnel into the same place, and while there was a lot to sift through....they were always there.

I understand that the changes I have looming overhead are adding some stress to my life, especially since I have no idea how to plan for school at the moment. My work schedule is definitely changing....but no one has any idea what my new schedule will look like, other than the fact that I will most likely be working Saturdays and Sundays when everything gets ironed out.

My work schedule now is one big cluster-eff as it is. With all the changes coming, they want to make sure everything is set up as best as it can be, and they have been having my switch back and forth between shifts all week. My start times are all over the place. Last week I started at 6am one day, 5:30am the next, 10am the next, back to 5:30 the following day, then finished off with an 11am start. Normally I have my alarm set for the same time every single day I work, but that had to change last week....which in turn affect me this week.

Sunday night was going to be a short night for me in terms of sleep, but I am used to that. I usually am up a little later on Saturdays, so when I sleep in on Sunday it makes it hard for me to fall asleep Sunday night. I set my alarm at about 10pm, when I was wide awake, and was laying down by about 11:15. I didn't actually fall asleep til about 2am, when I remember thinking, "at least I'll get a little more than three hours in." Well, I should have been thinking a little more than TWO hours. But I had set my alarm for a full hour later than normal, and never realized that until after I was up for about 10 minutes. I was tired. I was late. I was stinky. Thank you clouded brain.

Is it bad that I am already looking forward to laying down later tonight? I have a lot to do between now and then, but nothing is easier to focus on right now than laying down for bed later, and how happy I'll be to crawl under that blanket. :-D

Tigers Drop Game 2 in 11th Inning

With two outs in the top of the 9th, Miguel Cabrera tagged the right field foul pole last night in Kansas City to tie up the game 1-1 and eventually send it into extra innings. The Tigers took a 2-1 lead in the top of the 11th, but the Royals ended up scoring two of their own in the bottom of the inning for the win. Both teams are now 1-1.

These two teams will meet again for the third and final game of this series today at 2:10pm before the Tigers fly home for tomorrow's home opener against Cleveland.

I Was About 5, So It Was More Like....

This is the busiest week I have had in a while....this week is already rife with change. And it's only Wednesday. There is a lot going on around me, and a little going on with me, the specifics of which are really hard to discuss....in part because I don't know all of what is happening at this point. I can say, at least, that the changes I see happening now and in the near future are for the better. Some may be hard to handle, but eventually that too shall pass.

It's unfortunate that I don't have any details to share, because I am in somewhat of a babbling mood this morning and need a subject to go on about. Well when all else fails, I turn to sports....so how about them Tigers? And speaking of Tigers....how deft was that move by Tiger Woods on Monday? Holding a press conference on such a busy sports day. Kudos to his management team.

Monday was also the first game of the season for the Tigers, beating the Royals 8-4 in Kansas City and scoring 6 of those 8 runs in the 7th inning. I didn't watch one bit of the game, which is how it'll probably be for most of the season, but I did note the score. Their second game of the year is tonight, still in KC, at 8:00 pm and the home opener against Cleveland is this Friday.

The NCAA Championship game was Monday as well. Duke won....but barely.

The biggest news in sports the last few days has been the trade of Donovan McNabb from the Eagles to the Redskins. After 11 seasons with him as our bitter rival, it seems we are now hanging our immediate future on him. A lot of people are rushing to compare him to John Elway since it was Mike Shanahan who brought him in. While I must admit the numbers for both QBs up until Shanahan became their coach are eerily similar, with McNabb's being slightly better, I am going to just wait and see and be optimistic. I honestly don't see the same competetive fire in Donovan as I saw in John Elway....but only time will tell I guess.

~

Another note on my Skins; Albert Haynesworth seems to be on his way out. Shanahan tried to give him to Philly in the McNabb deal, but they didn't want him or that salary, and it seems that Haynesworth is destined for Shanahan's doghouse for as long as he is with the team. I'd hate to see the Skins/Haynesworth relationship end like this. He really is a rare talent that could be the key to Washington having a top 10 or top 5 defense the next 2-3 years, but if he does in fact get traded, I will REALLY believe that Dan Snyder is serious about keeping his hands off the team in an effort to win. It's really hard to believe he wants to let his prized catch go so easily.

....Out Like a Lamb

Farewell March....it's hard to believe you are already gone.

Morning Music, 3-29-10

1. Over My Head (Cable Car)- The Fray.

Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on your mind

2. Love Her Madly- The Doors.

Don't ya love her madly
Don't ya need her badly
Don't ya love her ways
Tell me what you say

Don't ya love her madly
Wanna be her daddy
Don't ya love her face
Don't ya love her as she's walkin' out the door
Like she did one thousand times before

3. Mess of Me- Switchfoot.

I am my own affliction
I am my own disease
There ain't no drug that they could sell
Ah, there ain't no drugs to make me well

There ain't no drugs
There ain't no drugs
There ain't no drugs
It's not enough
The sickness is myself

I made a mess of me
I wanna get back the rest of me
I've made a mess of me
I wanna spend the rest of my life alive

We lock our souls in cages
We hide inside our shells
It's hard to feed to the ones you love
Oh, when you can't forgive yourself
Yeah, forgive yourself

4. Creep- Radiohead.

You're just like an angel,
Your skin makes me cry

You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so fuckin' special

But I'm a creep,
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here

I don't care if it hurts,
I wanna have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul

I want you to notice
when I'm not around
You're so fuckin' special
I wish I was special

5. Starlight- Muse.

Hold you in my arms
I just wanted to hold you in my arms

My life
You electrify my life
Let's conspire to ignite
All the souls that would die just to feel alive

I'll never let you go
If you promise not to fade away
Never fade away

6. Just Breathe- Pearl Jam.

I'm a lucky man to count on both hands
The ones I love...

Some folks just have one
Others they got none, aw huh...

Stay with me
Let's just breathe

Practiced are my sins
Never gonna let me win, aw huh...
Under everything, just another human being, aw huh...
Yea, I don't wanna hurt, there's so much in this world
To make me bleed.

Nothing you would take
Everything you gave
Hold me 'till I die
Meet you on the other side

7. Animal- Neon Trees.

Here we go again
I kinda wanna be more then friends
So take it easy on me
I'm afraid you're never satisfied

Here we go again,
We're sick like animals we play pretend
You're just a cannibal and I'm afraid I won't get out alive
No I won't sleep tonight

Oh oh I want some more
Oh oh what are you waiting for
Take a bite of my heart tonight

8. You & Me- Dave Matthews Band.

Wanna pack your bags
Something small
Take what you need and we disappear
without a trace we'll be gone, gone
moon and the stars will follow the car
And then when we get to the ocean
Gonna take a boat to the end of the world
all the way to the end of the world

Oh when the kids are old enough
we gon' teach them to fly

You and me together
we could do anything, baby
you and me together yes, yes
you and me together
we could do anything, baby
you and me together yes, yes

you and i were not tied to the ground
not falling but rising like rolling around
eyes closed above the rooftops
eyes closed were gonna spin through the stars
Our arms wide as the sky we gon ride the blue
all the way to the end of the world
to the end of the world

Oh when the kids are old enough
we gon teach them to fly

You and me together
we could do anything, baby
you and me together yes, yes
you and me together
we could do anything, baby
you and me together yes, yes

we can always look back on what we did
always memory of you and me baby
right now its you and me forever girl
you know we could do better than
anything that we did
you know that you and me
we could do anything

you and me together
we could do anything, baby
you and me together yes,yes
the two of us together
we could do anything baby
you and me together yes, yes
two of us together, yes, yes
two of us together
we could do anything baby

9. Devil on My Shoulder- Billy Talent.

I dug a hole so deep
I'm gonna drown in my mistakes
can't even sell my soul
'Cause it ain't worth shit to take

I got the devil on my shoulder (over and over)
And I just can't sink any lower (lower and lower)
The hounds of hell are getting closer (closer and closer)
I got the devil on my shoulder (over and over)

Follow the rainbow, my lucky omen
There ain't no pot of gold, just copper tokens
I found the key to life, the lock was broken
All my accomplishments, are best left unspoken

10. How Soon is Now?- Smiths

I am human and I need to be loved
Just like everybody else does

Swing Life Away

Am I loud and clear, or am I breaking up?
Am I still your charm, or am I just bad luck?
Are we getting closer, or are we just getting more lost?

I'll show you mine if you show me yours first
Let's compare scars, I'll tell you whose is worse
Let's unwrite these pages and replace them with our own words

We live on front porches and swing life away,
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave till the end,
I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand

I've been here so long, I think that it's time to move
The winter's so cold, summer's over too soon
Let's pack our bags and settle down where palm trees grow

I've got some friends, some that I hardly know
But we've had some times, I wouldn't trade for the world
We chase these days down with talks of the places that we will go

We live on front porches and swing life away,
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave till the end,
I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand....until you hold my hand

I'll show you mine if you show me yours first
Let's compare scars, I'll tell you whose is worse
Let's unwrite these pages and replace them with our own words

We live on front porches and swing life away,
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave till the end,
I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand

Post Goals

Early this year I decided to make sure I wouldn't neglect this here blog at all throughout 2010. So I set a personal goal of 2-3 posts per week, with a total of 10-15 as a minimum for each month. At first I thought about not considering my playlist posts in this, since there isn't much writing involved, but sometimes the words I choose from these songs can really describe how I feel about something, somewhere, or someone better than any of my own words could. There is a reason a lot of these songs are hits, and many of my favorites have lyrics that will stand the test of time. Just look at how some of Dylan's lyrics apply as well to today as they did back when he first wrote them.

I have decided to up my goals for writing. One of the bloggers I follow makes sure to write every day for at least 10-20 minutes, no matter the subject. He might not share it with everyone on his blog, but if it's something he likes he'll post it. I've decided to try the same thing on MOST days. There may be times where work and school keep me from being creative (wow, that sounds kinda sad now that I think about it) and I'll have to skip a day here or there.

This new goal may or may not increase my post totals, since I am not sure that I'll have anything I want to share come out of my head when I sit down to write. Plus I have other places I write besides this blog, so it may not be written here to share anyway. The posting matters not. What does matter is that I'll keep my creative tools busy and sharpened for when I really need to use them or, better yet, when I WANT to use them.

Morning Music, 3-18-10

1. Us- Regina Spektor.

We're living in a den of thieves
Rummaging for answers in the pages
We're living in a den of thieves
And it's contagious

2. Fix You- The Offspring.

She wakes up
Rage and grace
Pulling me closer
Pushing away
And me the sharpest thorn on your vine
Twisting and turning, we're all intertwined

I wish I could heal you
And mend where you are broken
I wish I could heal you
And I wish you could heal me

3. Push it- Garbage.

This is the noise that keeps me awake
My head explodes and my body aches

4. Dani California- Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Black bandanna, sweet Louisiana
robbin' on a bank in the state of Indiana
She's a runner, rebel and a stunner
On her merry way sayin; baby whatcha gonna

California rest in peace
Simultaneous release
California show your teeth
She's my priestess, I'm your priest

She's a lover baby and a fighter
Shoulda seen it coming when it got a little brighter

5. You Can't Always Get What You Want- The Rolling Stones.

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes well you just might find
You get what you need

6. Dreams- The Cranberries.

Oh, my life is changing everyday,
In every possible way.
And oh, my dreams, it's never quite as it seems,
Never quite as it seems.

I know I've felt like this before, but now I'm feeling it even more,
Because it came from you.
And then I open up and see the person falling here is me,
A different way to be.

And now I tell you openly, you have my heart so don't hurt me.
You're what I couldn't find.
A totally amazing mind, so understanding and so kind;
You're everything to me.

7. Love Me Two Times- The Doors.

Love me one time
I could not speak
Love me one time, baby
Yeah, my knees got weak
But love me two times, girl
Last me all through the week
Love me two times
I'm goin' away

8. Don't Look Back in Anger- Oasis.

Slip inside the eye of your mind
Don't you know you might find
A better place to play
You said that you'd never been
But all the things that you've seen
Will slowly fade away

Step outside the summertime's in bloom
Stand up beside the fireplace
Take that look from off your face
You ain't ever gonna burn my heart out

Her soul slides away, but don't look back in anger
I heard you say

Take me to the place where you go
Where nobody knows, if it's night or day.

9. The Gift- Angels and Airwaves.

And suddenly
You’ve done it all
You won me over
In no time at all

And now I’ll stop the storm if it rains
I’ll light a path far from here
I’ll make your fear melt away
And the world we know disappear

10. Hurt- Johnny Cash.

I focus on the pain,
the only thing that's real.

Try to kill it all away,
but I remember everything.

I will let you down,
I will make you hurt.

I wear this crown of thorns,
upon my liar's chair.
Full of broken thoughts,
I cannot repair.
Beneath the stains of time,
the feelings disappear.

If I could start again,
a million miles away.
I would keep myself.
I would find a way.

13

Prospective job #13 = FAIL

I wonder how many I can rack up before I lose it....

Happy St Patrick's Day